Give these men two awards: one for extreme bravery and the other for extreme stupidity.

The story here [beware autoloading videos].

Discovered via the intertwebs, “What the Public Defender“, a site that uses moving images to make funny comments about commonly encountered public defender/criminal defense situations. Hilarity ensues, etc. For example, the below image is captioned “When a Judge scolds the DA“:

Two mostly independent stories to take you on an emotional rollercoaster this lazy Sunday. First, from the increasingly stupid United States of America, a story of how a teen’s life got flip-turned upside down. You see, he was just on the playground where he spent most of his days, minding his own business. You know, chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool and sometimes with this friends he liked to be shooting some b-ball outside of the school.

WAIT. DID HE JUST SAY SHOOT AND SCHOOL IN THE SAME SENTENCE? ARREST HIM! Once you’re done laughing, know that that’s exactly what happened to 19-year old Travis Clawson because a doctor’s office called his voicemail to confirm an appointment, heard the above line, thought he was shooting people outside the school and called cops. Who arrested him first, then spent the 20 seconds it takes to realize it’s the theme song from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. No word on whether Carlton showed up to dance and everyone laughed at him.

[Also: is this a thing now? People leave notes of their criminal intent as voicemail messages? "Hi, you've reached my cellphone. I'm unavailable right now because I'm robbing that Stop-n-Go on Orchard and Willard. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you when I get out in 5-20 years because I'm stupid enough to leave --- BEEP."]

The second story is from the always-slightly-odd-but-not-as-odd-as-the-Japanese-because-those-guys-are-fucking-crazy-am-I-right-with-the-tentacles-and-cartoons-and-stuff-British. Apparently a crime happened, as it often does, and one of the witnesses to the crime was PC Peach. So those industrious prosecutors wrote to the police department asking for Peach’s statement. The police department wrote back, saying it was a typo and PC Peach was actually PD Peach. The prosecutors didn’t really care and demanded that statement. So they were sent this:

PD Peach stands for Police Dog Peach.

Dog, like Will Smith is the Dog Dawg Dogg man.

All you can do is have a sense of humor, I suppose. Hazardous duty pay wouldn’t hurt, either.

I will not explain. I will make you watch the video first.

Via Lowering the Bar, which describes it thusly:

The incident involved not one but two geniuses. The brains of the operation was a 39-year-old man who said that after the theater shooting in Colorado, he wanted to find out how long it would take police in his area to respond to a similar report. “I wanted to run a little test here in Phoenix, Arizona,” he said while narrating a video of the event that he posted on YouTube. “I want to find out how safe I really am, and I want to know the response time of the Phoenix police department.”

…

Still, on Monday (almost two months after the incident) police did arrest the man. They charged him with endangerment, which seems potentially valid, and “creating a false impression of a terrorist act,” which to me is more questionable. If what someone did endangered others, that’s a crime, so why do we need to pile on with more “anti-terror” laws that at least potentially infringe on free speech? The man was also charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor (I guess so) and “misconduct involving simulated explosives” (same objection).

Be sure to click the link to LTB for bonus idiocy.

Here at ‘a public defender’, it’s my job to keep you informed of the latest trends in pop culture and all that stuff that the kids are listening to these days and whatnot so you know exactly who to tell to get off your damn lawn already. So here’s the summer’s biggest pop sensation:

The appropriate reaction is: “What is this I don’t even…”

Okay fine, it’s pretty awesome. You might even want to check out the SNL skit about it, which, thanks to Seth McFarlane, is actually funny.

But you still have to get off my lawn.

Via, story here.